Most people in real estate these days know the name Robert Reffkin, who serves as CEO of mega-brokerage Compass. But fewer know his wife, Benís Reffkin. That, however, may be changing.
Among other things, Mrs. Reffkin is an NYU grad and Columbia Business School MBA holder. She authored a book, No One Succeeds Alone, with her husband. She’s involved in a women’s affinity group at Compass, hosts Friday night Shabbat dinners, and imparts the wisdom gained through her executive coaching business to agents across the country.
Now, she wants agents recently brought into Compass International Holdings through its acquisitions to know that the company is there for them, too.
“We want all our agents to know that we’re here, we’re on it, we care about them and we’re going to do whatever it takes to make this industry work better for them,” Benís told Inman.
In a recent conversation, Inman learned that for now, Benís is focused on supporting her family — including Robert and their three children — but looks forward to expanding her own career goals in the not-too-distant future.
A tough childhood
Benís’ mother grew up in a rough home and by age 15 had run away. She had Benís when she was just 20 and raised her daughter as a single mom. During that period, they had to rely on public assistance for support.
But Benís’s mom always stressed to her daughter that if she focused on her education, she could build a good life for herself. The advice stuck with her, and Benís worked hard to prioritize her schoolwork, until one day when she was in fifth grade, a teacher suggested she join an advanced program at school.
“That really saved me,” Benís said. “I didn’t go to great schools. In Yonkers, they were all public schools and underfunded. But I was always in the gifted and talented program in school. So I was just around other kids who cared about their grades and better teachers. It’s unfortunate. I felt bad for the other kids sometimes, but that’s the way it was.”
Teaming up with Robert
Benís went on to study psychology and business at NYU, and her first job out of school was at an executive recruiting firm.
One day, when a client was unexpectedly unable to attend a nonprofit event, she was asked to attend in their place.
It was at that event that Benís first met Robert. When she and her boss showed up to the event, a little bit late, Robert was on stage with Wes Moore, who is now the governor of Maryland. The pair were presenting an award to Ray McGuire, a former Citigroup banker, who ran for New York City mayor in 2021.
Throughout the evening, Benís said she noticed Robert gesturing at her, and he eventually had his friends go and collect her business card for him. About a week later, he gave her a call, and their lives quickly became intertwined.
Her first impression of the now-seasoned CEO was, “I just felt like he was someone who really had it together,” Benís said.
With other guys she had dated previously, Benís said it sometimes felt like she had to take care of them. Robert was the first man she met with whom it felt like the relationship was a team of equals. She said that witnessing his dedication and focus to his set goals was also exhilarating.
“I’ve joked in the past that basically, once we started dating, I felt like I jumped on a train — a Rob Reffkin train — which is fast and it was really exciting,” Benís told Inman.
“I saw that this is a guy who was on a mission, and the best thing is to be by his side on those missions,” she added. “And that’s what we’ve done, and we’ve accomplished so much together.”
The Reffkin family | Compass
Becoming invested in Compass
After Benís and Robert got married in 2012, they started to have kids and, together, decided that Benís would focus on raising their family while the kids were young.
Although she found motherhood fulfilling, Benís quickly realized that she needed an outlet for her ambition and curiosity. Given her background in psychology and business, and her naturally empathetic nature, starting her own executive coaching practice felt like a no-brainer.
At first, the couple wanted to ensure that there was a hard line between Benís’s coaching endeavors and the brokerage to avoid conflicts of interest. Some of Benís’ first clients were top agents at Compass, but they paid her directly, and nothing went through the brokerage. (Benís is not accepting new clients at this time.)
“But ultimately, over time, I realized that I didn’t need [my coaching business] to be separate [from Compass],” Benís said. ”That we would really be a team and I can pour some of that energy into Compass and that it’s well-received and welcomed, and it seems to have an impact, and people appreciate it.”
After the pandemic, when people had drifted away from the office, it felt like the brokerage’s culture was in a strained place. It was at that time that Benís decided to take her talents to Compass to try and bring people together again and inspire them. She did this on her own time and has never been paid by the firm for her coaching services or speaking engagements.
“[Robert] said to me, ‘If you can help create reasons or excuses for people to get together in person again, go for it,’” Benís recalled. “And so I ended up visiting 15 different markets, and shared my story in a vulnerable and open way.”
Benís has also gained recognition at the firm for working with the affinity group Women of Compass and for hosting Friday night Shabbat dinners for small groups of the brokerage’s employees, agents and executives. It gives people an opportunity to share ideas and leave the stress from the work week behind, while making them feel appreciated.
“What I’ve seen again and again is that when people gather in a space where they feel comfortable being themselves, incredible connections happen,” Benís said.
What’s next
Back in 2012, when Compass first launched, could Benís have expected the brokerage to transform into what it is today? “Absolutely not,” she said.
The first year-and-a-half was a lot of trial and error, Benís said, but she and Robert were simply hoping he could create a company that would have an impact and provide value. At first, she said, Robert felt some internal pressure to create a new model for the real estate industry, but ultimately realized it’s all about prioritizing agents and focusing on the agent-client relationship.
“Once we aligned ourselves [with agents] and he developed this clarity of vision and the path forward, the dream started to expand. But even if I spoke to you last year, I don’t think I could really imagine being where we are today with all these brands and 340,000 agents.”
Benís said she believes the firm would not have come this far if it were not for its intentional focus on culture. She added that she sometimes feels as though Compass’s appeal to agents due to its tech platform is slightly over-publicized in the media, while its emphasis on cultivating company culture is neglected.
As the company continues to grow, now with several additional brands under its purview, she wants agents to know that the larger company intends to help preserve and cultivate the individual brands’ cultures as well.
As for Benís herself, she realizes that her life and aspirations will evolve in phases over time, and once her kids are a bit older, she plans to focus more on her own career pursuits. Those will likely include more speaking engagements and, hopefully, a book that she can author on her own.
Although she called her involvement with Compass “unexpected,” Benís said it’s been exciting to feel like she can be a partner to Robert and what he is building at the brokerage.
Email Lillian Dickerson